So I shall be doing a Top # List of my favorite shows. I say "#" because shows that last one season probably don't have as many great episodes as those that last twenty seasons. With that being the case, I will assign different numbers based on how many seasons a show has run (or if the show is currently running, I'll stop at the latest even numbered season).
I shall go in increments of 5 for every two seasons a show has been on the air. So, if a show lasts one or two seasons, I'll recount my Top 5 Favorites.
3 - 4 seasons - Top 10
5 - 6 seasons - Top 15
3 - 4 seasons - Top 10
5 - 6 seasons - Top 15
7 - 8 seasons - Top 20, etc.
I will also make sure I've either a) seen every episode of the series I'm discussing or b) seen every episode of the seasons I am covering.
So, let's kick things off with one of my favorite shows as a child:
The Top 5 Episodes of Eerie, Indiana
- When I was young, I loved books and shows about "weird" things. Goosebumps was my passion. Then, one Saturday morning, I discovered a show that devoted itself to "weirdness." Eerie, Indiana was about the adventures of a 13-year-old boy named Marshall Teller whose family just moved to "the most normal city in America." However, Eerie is actually "the center of weirdness for the entire planet" and nobody in the town seems to notice. The inhabitants are either oblivious to it or just as weird themselves. Marshall meets a young kid named Simon who is the only other person who realizes that this city is weird. The two of them set out to document their encounters in the city so that they may one day uncover the truth about the city or leave behind a record incase their investigations ever kill them.
- This show could have easily been another kids show about monsters or ghosts, but the show took it's concept of weirdness to a new level. It was actually intended as a comedy for adults shown in primetime, but it didn't last there. Fortunately for me, Fox Kids decided to show it on Saturday mornings. The first episode was about housewives who threw tupperware parties and actually slept in giant tupperware containers to preserve their youth. This show didn't mess around when it said it was about weird things.
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5) The Loyal Order of the Corn
- Women had tupperware parties, while men had the Loyal Order of the Moose. These aren't really relevant any more, but watch old Laurel and Hardy movies or Flintstones episodes and you'll see references to organizations for men who wanted to get away from their wives. Marshall's dad joins the Loyal Order of the Corn (a parody of these organizations) and as Marshall knew, if it's happening in Eerie, it has to be weird. While snooping around, Marshall bumps into the weird gray haired kid.
- Wait, let me back up. You should know that, even though the show only lasted one season, it broke down into two halves: Pre-Gray-Haired-Kid and Gray-Haired-Kid.
That's right, it was Jason Marsden, also known as "That guy from the '90s." He popped up everywhere. His role in Eerie, Indiana was that of a kid with amnesia, who also thought that the city of Eerie was weird, but he was too self-involved to care. He was more interested in exploiting the oblivousness of the inhabitants for money. Ever since he was introduced, he appeared in every remaining episode. His past was a complete mystery to everyone.- Back to this episode. The Gray-Haired-Kid, who has decided to give himself the name "Dash X," works as a waiter at the Corn Lodge. It is eventually discovered that the bartender of the lodge (played by the original "My Favorite Martian" Bill Bixby) is actually a Martian (Bixby is typecast, I guess). He is using the lodge as way to get back to his home via...giant television screen...okay, I don't really remember the plot exactly, but I do remember that Simon somehow ends up on Pluto (where it snows). But the plot wasn't as important as the point when Dash-X asks Bixby if he was his father and that he too was a Martian. The Martian does not give him a definite answer, and Dash is devestated. We finally get a chance to learn about this mysterious character, and we are crushed along with him.
- He then shows up in other episodes and continues to be a selfish dick.
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4) Heart on a Chain
- This episode is about love and death. This episode breaks away from the weirdness, slightly, because love and death are weird enough as it is. Marshall and his friend Devon fall for a new girl Melanie at school. She has a heart condition and does not have long to live, so the two boys try to woo her as fast as possible. They each get her gifts. Marshall gives her a giant heart that has spring loaded snakes (not a good idea to give someone who can die when startled) and Devon gives her a heart on a chain necklace, with the note "My heart is yours." For anyone who's had to compete with a friend for a girl's affections, this moment breaks your heart. Afterward, Devon gets hit by a milk truck (this becomes important in a later episode) and dies. His heart is transplanted into Melanie's body. Awww.
- Let's break from the emotional plotline to discuss Marshall's family. He has a mom, a dad, and an older sister. And they are so normal it is hilarious. They spend the entire episode going "Awww" whenever Marshall references Melanie. When Marshall takes her up to his attic to show her his collection of weirdness, his family bursts in on their romantic moment to document it on film. The best part is when Marshall's mother leans in to Marshall and whispers "We like her" when Melanie is clearly within earshot.
- Back to the plot. With Devon's heart now in her body, Melanie starts behaving more like him and whenever she tries to kiss Marshall, she gets a mild heart attack. The show implies that Devon's heart is controlling her, but it eventually becomes a metaphor for not being able to let someone go after they have passed on.
- Eventually, Melanie does let Devon go, and is finally able to kiss Marshall. But she must leave him to figure her life out. Marshall accepts this, then returns to his little friend Simon, who had been feeling neglected this episode (for he is too young to understand the appeal of girls). The smile on Simon's face after Marshall asks if he wants to look for UFO's is priceless.
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Editor's note: This was the only episode I didn't see as a child, but rather when I was older. So I just watched it again to make sure it was as good as I remembered it and I noticed something subtle that happens right at the end that makes this episode ten times more tragic. It made my heart jump. SPOLIER OF THE BIG FINAL MOMENT: I used to think the ending, when Marshall says "we weren't alone in the cemetery that day," referred to Devon's spirit and "that was the last I'd ever see her" meant Melanie eventually moved away and the single tear that the angel statue cried meant Devon was upset that he eventually lost the girl as well. BUT, upon rewatching, I saw that as Marshall walks away, in the background we see the Grim Reaper advancing on Melanie. It's very hard to see if you aren't looking for it. So this leads me to think that Devon (who was still in charge of Melanie's heart) actually killed her, and the single tear was to imply he had to do it so that the two could be together in the afterlife.
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3) The Losers
- Eerie, Indiana introduced a lot of unique stories, but this one proposed an idea that I still like to believe is true in everyday life. Marshall's father loses his briefcase which not only held important documents for his job, but was also a gift from his wife. With his father's job and marriage at stake, Marshall sets out to find the briefcase. If you watch the scene where the briefcase is lost, you'll notice that it is set down in the background, then mysteriously disappears, like some sleight-of-hand card trick.
- Marshall eventually discovers that there is an area underneath Eerie where all lost items go. There are two people responsible for this: one who goes out in the world and brings items down underground, and one who keeps records of everything lost. Marshall accuses the two of stealing, but they insist that their job is essential to the growth of society. Without lost items, people would not be motivated to get new ones. The economy would collapse. Realizing it is all about bureaucracy, Marshall makes a mess of all of the files and escapes, but not without taking the big rubber "LOST" stamp. The bureaucratic loser eventually tries to track Marshall down and exchange the briefcase for the stamp, since he has now learned the feeling of losing an item that is precious to him. They make the exchange, but then see that Marshall's parents have reconciled with a new briefcase, so the loser takes the "lost" briefcase back.
- So now I don't feel as bad when I lose something. I just know it is filed away somewhere underground.
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2) The ATM With a Heart of Gold
- This episode borderlines on unnecessarily creepy very often, but the message is worth sitting through the horror that is the ATM.
- The ATM is a new model, invented by Marshall's father, that features a screen on top with a floating human face wearing a bowtie. The head talks and greets people using the ATM. The idea behind it was to create a more pleasant atmosphere in one's bank going experiences. Although the head is fixed with a creepy smile and monotone voice, there is no reason to think it will do anything harmful. However, the new machine is not met with horror, but rather with disinterest. People use the ATM, but since it is a machine, no one bothers to respond to it's cries of "Hello! Have a pleasant day!" No one until little Simon happens upon it.
- Simon's background is never seen but it is clear that he comes from an emotionally unstable and low-income household, so he clings to Marshall as an older brother figure. So when Marshall starts getting tired of Simon, he has no choice but to seek comfort somewhere else. When the ATM greets him as he walks by, Simon is the first human to respond back. When asked to enter his pin code., Simon doesn't understand and just types his name on the number pad. The ATM dispenses some money and tells him to have a good day. The friendship is born.
- Simon starts spending more time with the ATM, gathering money, and the ATM starts developing a personality and bonds with Simon. It is eventually made clear that the ATM is stealing from other people's accounts to please Simon.
- Eventually, Simon comes to terms with the fact that he must return the money, and in doing so, the ATM returns to it's original state of no personality. It is a very sad scene to watch. Especially afterwards, when the ATM stops working altogether, and it is implied that it killed itself.
- This show is bleak, man.
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1) The Lost Hour
- In farming areas, such as Indiana, Daylight's Savings Time is not observed. Marshall hates living in Eerie, and tries to retain his ties with the rest of the world by setting his watch back one hour.
- He then wakes up the next day in "the previous hour."
- Everything remains as it was an hour ago, except no one else is around (for they are moving along time normally). This new Eerie is not completely empty. Marshall meets a girl who went missing last year at Daylight's Savings Time who also set her watch back. However, she never really caught onto the reason everyone disappeared. She just thought everyone abandoned her. There are also "trashmen" on the hunt for her (and now Marshall) since they don't belong in this hour. There is also a kindly old milkman (who I like to think is the same one who killed Devon with his truck). The milkman helps Marshall by telling him that at the end of the hour, he must set his watch forward again to return home, lest he stay trapped for a year. The girl eventually obeys, but Marshall realizes he left his watch back in his own time. The milkman shows him a window to the "present hour" in his truck. The window puts Marshall's face on the milk carton under "Missing." Through this, Marshall can communicate with Simon, and in a race against time, Simon manages to help Marshall return home.
- Simple story, but the reason this places so high on the list is because of the milkman. The milkman is actually a future Marshall, who has commited himself to living in the lost hour to retain balance in Eerie. If the show had lasted longer than one season, I'm sure we would have learned more about Marshall and his connection to the city. But alas, it was cut short. It was revived later with a different cast, but I'll discuss that at a later time.
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- Try to find episodes of this show and watch it. It's corny and cheesy, but it'll blow your mind.
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